Monday, September 19, 2011

"Fall"ing for Storms

I can't get it together today.
Foggy brain dragging me down.
I don't appreciate the way my eyes keep blurring out of focus, nor the way thoughts trail off or get lost mid sentence.

I can say, though, that I am glad Fall is finally here. I love the cooler weather.  Don't judge me, but I hate summer.  Now that I'm done with school and working full time, Summer seems utterly pointless to me.  I hate the heat.  Everything lovely and good comes with Fall and Winter: Hot Chocolate, Shoes (cute ones), Coats (cute ones...), Thanksgiving, Christmas (GAH! I love Christmas), Halloween, Clothes (cute ones...) get the idea.

I love the colors of fall and the changing of times.  Life speeds up,inspiration strikes.  I tend to fly in my writing during the fall, winter, and even spring.  I'm currently fleshing out a new idea with two new characters I'm excited about.  I'm excited about the weather.

From where I sit, typing these words, I can see storm clouds moving in.  There is nothing more beautiful to me than a storm.  Something in the swirling darkness of uncertainty reminds me of the glory and power of God.  So much power and potential destruction combined into something that is also life-giving and necessary for sustaining.  I hope this storm hits--I hope it's good.

Sometimes I wonder what it would feel like to have so much power.  What might it feel like to wield lightening or control rain?  What sort of energy would course through your body as the electrical current ran the course of your every synapse?  What would it feel like to be in control of something so dangerously bewitching?  Am I the only one who dreams of these things?  Is it my writer's mind--my insane imagination--that conjures ideas of creating fire, controlling lightening, breathing life, and conquering death?  I doubt a day goes by where I wonder what it would be like to be one of my characters--to act like them, think like them sure, but really to have the unique attributes I give them that make them interesting.

What would it be like to bring the calm after the storm--when your life is raging and rolling and nothing seems to be within your control.  I'm about to start a faith group with a few friends of mine, and I'm excited about living my life alongside other people.  I have a tendency to be a recluse when it comes to the real me.  The more I think about delving deeper into my relationship with Jesus alongside others, the more excited I become.

It's like the way I feel about the writers I know--there's something about knowing you have a passion, and that the person sitting next to you shares it and wants to talk about it.  Lifelong relationships are made through groups like these, and I know I can turn to my Blue Monkeys for anything.  I'm hoping those individuals in this small group will be the same way.

What about you?  Who do you turn to when the storm is raging?  You don't have the power to control it--that wasn't a gift you were given.  Who has the power to walk you through it?  Who is there after the storm--the person(s) who picks you back up?

Or maybe you're traveling alone, down a dusky road.  The clouds are darkening, and you haven't a soul in the world to turn to.  The wind is picking up, and it's getting colder.  Only dirt road lies ahead, even more behind.  In the distance you can see a little cottage, bravely standing against the storm.  You have a choice to run to it--but will you?  And if you do, who will you find inside, waiting for you to return?

1 comment:

Stephanie Rae Pazicni said...

Maybe I'll dance in the rain instead of going inside.