Monday, November 7, 2011

Long silent

Snow has reached us, and I'm wondering if that means Fall was over before it began.  We had summer heat riding all the way through September and even sneaking into a good chunk of October.  I sure was looking forward to that in-between weather, but as long as Summer is gone, I don't care which season is waving at me through the windows.

It feels kind of strange to think that I've been quiet on the blog front for about a month.  October brought insanity into my work life, and I hardly had time to think let alone write.  Truly, since I finished my last novel I don't think I've written for even two consecutive days.  It's been splashes here or there when I've had both time and energy to think.  But now October is over, and I am smiling at my favorite time of the year.

You see, most people enjoy the holiday season.  I revel in it.  Christmas and Thanksgiving are some of my favorite times of the year--and my fun starts before those even arrive.
My birthday is about two weeks before thanksgiving (depending on the year), and I'm one of those individuals who is always excited to celebrate.  Lately a book about love languages has been brought up around me on almost a regular basis--by several different people.  My love language (my own definition, I haven't read the book) comes in two folds just as everyone else's does.  To show love, I'm a giver.  When it's someone's birthday, or just a Tuesday when I happen to find something perfect for them, I love to give them a gift that is filled with thought, time, energy, and when I have  I like to see the look on someone's face when I have catered a gift to them, not just thrown something generic that I could have stuck any name on and it would have sufficed for a dozen different people.  Even when I have no clue and give a gift card I make sure the place is specific to the person.  I never have understood how people could hand someone like me a gift card to Lowes and think it was a smart idea.
With that in mind, I've had to do a lot of thinking on what my love language is when it comes to receiving.  I thought I had it pegged--at least in terms of what the book might've said.  However, the more I've thought about it, the more I've decided it's almost something a bit more.  I've done this thinking because in the conversations where this topic has come up, I've been very good about picking out what ISN'T my love language (I think anyone can succeed at that).

My love language is NOT touch.

I don't enjoy being touched.  My space. My bubble.  When it comes to family and close friends I enjoy hugs and playful shoving or pats on the shoulder, but when it comes to acquaintances, guys trying to flirt, and complete strangers I cannot stand being touched.  If you're a guy whom I find attractive you MIGHT be able to get away with it once in awhile.
It bothers me most when it comes from men.  I'm not one to show public displays of affection with gentleman I am dating, and so a gentleman I have no desire to date attempting to show affection by continually tapping me on the arm to get my attention generally is barking up the wrong tree with me.  Now, I know what you're thinking..."Tapping you on the arm to get your attention?  That's a bit extreme for you to be thinking that's showing affection.  Aren't you vain and full of yourself."
Well, yes, that would be the case IF the man in question didn't tell me "My love language is touch" and then proceed to jab me in the arm every time my attention wavered to the girl I mentor with whom I was having a conversation...first.
I'm being snippy.  And mostly unfair.  Sadly, this is what space invasion does to me.  The quickest way to put me on guard and make me uncomfortable/uneasy is to be a Male I don't know very well and find a way to physically interact with me more than once in a conversation.

While this stood out to me like a man streaking through a well publicized soccer match, the truth about what my receiving language was remained hidden.  Now, without reading the book, I've decided for myself what that language is.


I just deleted a slew of paragraphs explaining what this means, but then I felt it sounded too whiny.  Basically, what I do for someone else, I want them to be thankful for it and be willing to do the same.

So it seems my first jump back into the blogging world is silly nonsense about my love languages.  However, if you're trying to get to know me better (or just happen to be a friend wondering what I'd like for my birthday) then maybe this could be of some help.
If you are a passerby, I hope this blog thoroughly amused you, what with my rants and sideways tantrums about the things I do and do not appreciate.

Do you know your love language?  Do you think it's important to know?
I'm not sure knowing mine makes much of a difference, except maybe to say I now understand why I might feel more slighted than another might in the same situation.

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